Show on the Road: Sunday 6/23

Dear Constant Reader,

Vote for The Boston Babydolls for “Best Theatre Group” and B.A.B.E. for “Best Dance Classes“!

Buy your tickets to The Teaseday Club on July 9th in my name!

When last we left our intrepid burlesquers, we had conquered Asbury Park and then Pittsburgh. Now it’s time for the long trek home.

This missive is going to be long. Appropriate as it was the longest day. Not really, because the previous day had been the Summer Solstice; this just *felt* like the longest day ever.

I have to supply a little backstory here. Part of the reason we played Pittsburgh (other than because Chris really wanted to see us) was that Scratch had to get some stuff out of storage near by. Early Sunday morning we were to pick up a trailer, load it up, get back on the road and have everyone snug in their beds by midnight or so.

Saturday afternoon Scratch got a call from U-Haul in some town in PA we’d never heard of asking why he hadn’t picked up his trailer at noon. Uh-oh. He called the place we were supposed to go, but they didn’t know anything and didn’t have a trailer for us. Apparently U-Haul thinks switching reservations without notifying the customer is okay.

Then there was a fruitless call to the local customer service which ended with the bitchy supervisor refusing to acknowledge that there was a problem and hanging up on us. Fortunately we reached Dee, a saint at the national customer service, who was bound and determined to make this right. The best she could do was a trailer at a place near our hotel (yay!) which didn’t open until noon (boo). Still, something is better than nothing.

The glitch in our plans wasn’t all bad. We slept in a bit Sunday morning and then went to Hugger Mugger Tasty Recipes for cinnamon groovy-cakes with warm hyrup (that’s exactly what the menu says! Why would I make this stuff up?). Then Scratch took us to Living Treasure Animal Park to make up for skipping Reptileland, Penn’s Cave, and all the other attractions we could only stare at longingly from the car window.

It was a fun little zoo. We fed and pet many baby animals. The picture shows Stella determined to feed a baby goat which kept getting shoved out of the way by its elders. But she stood firm and made sure the little one only got his treat. Everyone was quite charmed by the tiny deer and amazed by the horns on the Watusi cattle. And we got to pet a baby kangaroo.

I tried to get the ostrich to hand over just a couple of feathers, but it was having none of it. There was a gorgeous black leopard (one could see its spots in the sunlight!) that rolled over as though to have its belly rubbed, just like a certain cat we left back in Boston. We just had time for a quick pass in the gift shop before we had to hit the road again. You can see Brigitte trying on a new boa.

We were delighted that our trailer was actually where it was supposed to be. And then I had to get under the car to unhitch the cargo carrier, so the trailer could go on. Touring is so glamourous! After some tense moments when there were issues with the hitching, we were good to go! Off to the storage unit, where loading up was fast and easy, thanks to Stella & Brigitte who worked hard despite having no connection to the stuff in storage. The GPS said we’d be back in Boston just before midnight.

Midnight. Ha ha.

It was a long, long drive. We tried to keep the driver awake and each other entertained. A sampling of the frequently heard in the Babydoll-mobile:

“Hey, more roadkill!”
“Look at all the fucks I do not give.”
“I’m so happy I’m shooting my dick off.”
(sung)”We are never, ever, ever getting out of Pennsylvania.”
“We are totally trending right now.”
“Google, you two-faced whore!”

Late in the evening, still in PA (as we were for most of the trip), seeking dinner, we ended up in a biker bar. We feared this was going to be a big mistake, but the bartender was very welcoming, the kitchen was open, and the wings were quite good.

Under the super-moon we drove and drove.

At some godawful hour we finally got to the Pike, and even more godawful hours later everyone was home. I tumbled into bed at 4:30am. The drive was hellish, it was epic, but it was also fun. Stella & Brigitte are great traveling companions and I would totally do it again. And will — we’re playing Johnstown, PA in July and the Ohio Burlesque Festival in August.


Published in: on 1 July 2013 at 9:56 am  Leave a Comment  
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